How to Navigate Holiday Burnout Without Losing Yourself

It starts small.

Maybe you say yes to something you didn't really want to do. Perhaps you stay up late baking for the school party even though you're already running on fumes. Or maybe you put a smile on your face when someone says, "This is the most wonderful time of the year!" — but inside, all you can think is, I'm so tired.

I wrote about this in a previous blog titled "A Guide to Navigating Mental Health During the Holidays." You can check it out by clicking here.

Holiday burnout doesn't usually come all at once. It often builds slowly and subtly in the name of being kind, helpful, or thoughtful. But at some point, the effort costs more than you have to give, leaving you depleted.

And if you're feeling that right now, I want you to know that it happens to many of us, and you don't have to keep pushing through.

In fact, I'd strongly advise against it.

What holiday burnout actually looks like

Holiday burnout doesn't always mean you've shut down completely or that you're falling apart. Sometimes it looks like:

• Saying yes when you really mean no

• Feeling overstimulated even by things you usually enjoy

• Snapping at the people you love, then feeling guilty right after

• Feeling numb — like you're just going through the motions

• Crying in the car, behind closed doors, or in between errands

• Wondering why the season doesn't feel the way it used to

You might be doing all the "right" things — showing up, cooking, decorating, coordinating — but underneath, you're exhausted. Not just physically, but emotionally. And it's okay to admit that.

The pressure to make things magical

There's a lot of unspoken pressure during this time of year. You might feel responsible for holding everything together. Keeping family traditions alive. Managing everyone else's feelings. Making sure the kids have good memories. Making sure the meal is perfect.

Please know that it's not all on you and you don't have to wear yourself out trying to hold up every piece of the holiday experience.

Sometimes the most meaningful thing you can do — for yourself and everyone around you — is to slow down and check in.

What do you feel?

What do you need?

And how can you act on what you now know?

Why burnout hits harder for caregivers, empaths, and helpers

If you're someone who naturally holds space for others — emotionally, logistically, or both — the holidays can stretch your capacity in ways that few people notice. You may be managing schedules, fielding family dynamics, and absorbing emotional tension while still trying to be present, cheerful, and "on."

That can be overwhelming even in the best of years. Add in grief, unresolved conflict, health concerns, financial stress, or just plain exhaustion — and it's no wonder you're feeling fried.

Burnout isn't a sign that you're doing something wrong. It's a sign that something needs to shift.

What it means to tend to your own needs

You might be used to putting everyone else first. But you're important too. You're allowed to have limits and to need space. You're also allowed to want rest, even when others want your attention.

Tending to yourself during the holidays might look like:

• Leaving the party early — or not going at all

• Ordering food instead of cooking

• Turning off your phone for a few hours

• Saying no to something even if people don't understand

• Doing less, with more intention

You don't need a big, splashy, and dramatic escape plan (unless that's your thing, lol). Just a series of intentional and clear decisions that honor what you need for you, right now.

Counseling in Maryland for holiday burnout

If the season feels like too much, therapy can be a place to pause and reset. Not because you're failing (because you're not) — but because you're human, and this time of year can be intense.

In my work with clients seeking counseling in Maryland, I see a common theme during the holidays: the desire to do it all, combined with the growing sense that something's getting lost in the process — usually themselves.

In therapy, we slow things down.

We talk about the pressure, the expectations, the resentment, the guilt — all the things you're not "supposed" to say out loud.

And we figure out what needs to shift, so you can feel more grounded and present, not just for the holidays, but for yourself.

A few reminders for this season

• You don't have to say yes to everything.

• You don't have to make it magical for everyone else at the expense of your own peace.

• You're allowed to be tired.

• You're allowed to rest.

• You're allowed to make this season work for you.

Making the decision to recognize and tend to your needs doesn't make you a bad person. It gives you the ability to be honest with yourself and more authentic as you move through the holiday season.

Give yourself permission to honor your energy and your needs.

You're not alone

If this time of year feels more challenging than usual — if you're finding yourself overwhelmed, irritable, or just done — you're not the only one.

Counseling in Maryland can offer a space to exhale, get clear, and reconnect with what matters to you — not just what's expected of you.

If that sounds like something you need, I'd be honored to support you.

👉🏽 Schedule a free 15-minute consultation

You don't have to keep going on empty.

Let's talk.